I have some really good speakers in my flat, and they were quite pricey. Not only do they delivery stunning sound, but they look good and contribute to the visual appearance of my flat. Granted that visual appearance may be "Bachalor Bloke Pad", but it's a visual appearance none the less.
Anyway, my cleaner (who is in all other respects utterly fantastic) managed to dent the bass diaphragm of my very sexy speakers. Yes speakers can be sexy, but to appreciate this you have to be (1) A guy (2) Single (3) Me. Now the dent isn't the worst thing that has ever happened in the world‡ but it really irks me. It hasn't effected the sound to much, just being base, but it looks ugly.
Now a new diaphragm costs £85, but this is under the minimum claim for my cleaning services insurance, so they wont be able to claim on it. The cleaning service did mail me saying
I am very sorry about this, we are unable to make an insurance claim for this but would like to offer some form of compensation please let me know what you think would be suitable?
Now this is quite clever. Obviously I want £85 as compensation, so I can replace the diaphragm, and obviously they are not going to do this. This is a bit like when you try discipline a child by saying "Well you think of your punishment". The kids stuck, as he has to think of something suitable horrible as punishment, but obviously doesn't want to have any punishment.
I really have no idea what to suggest. She (the owner of the cleaning service) has actually (and completely) stumped me. And writing back and saying "Free cleans to the value of the speaker" seems greedy. I'm not entirely sure if she's intentionally outsmarting me, or it was just an genuine offer of compensation. She's quite cute, I should get her to buy me dinner. Or a new diaphragm.
‡ Like having your house destroyed by an earthquake or hurricane.
1. Destructor
Uhm, obviously ask for the £85, but really, can’t you just take that off and pop out the dent from the inside?
2. graybo
I think Dan is right. I think you should just pop it out. Phnaar. AND ask her for a date. Nothing ventured…
3. Pete
Yeah, do it. All of it.
4. Adrian
I’m going to try popping it off, but I do risk damaging it further. I’m not good with my hands.
I last saw her 3½ years ago, I’m hardly going to hit on her. It would be compensation though. I was actually going to say something sleazy originally instead of dinner, but thought the better of it.
5. matthew
How does ‘free cleans to the value of the speaker’ seem greedy? Seems like a perfect resolution to the problem to me… In lieu of just giving you the £85, that is.
6. Adrian
I guess accidents do happen.
7. Nuge
Make her wear a french maid’s outfit from now on.
8. Damo
I am glad that someone else beat me to that one. How about “£85 worth of cleaning and the odd massage”? That might work……err, well i dunno now. . . . . . I’ll get my coat.
9. Adrian
Well I’m getting a free clean today, and a few extra hours over the next month, so whilst not £85 and no massages or dinners, at least I’m getting something.
Then there is always the chance of me breaking the speaker entirely trying to fix it …
10. grumpyoldman
I’ve have exactly the same thing done to my Linn Helix tweeters thanks to my daughter (2 years old at the time).
I found you can’t push them out. You will need to pull them out. I found a bit of parcel tape worked. I’ve had to do this several time now. I don’t believe it’s affected the sound, hovever having gone deaf in one ear since buying them I can’t be certain.
11. graybo
What about your own insurance? Would they pay? Or take you for dinner? Or dress in a French maid’s outfit?
12. Araxie
Yes, that sounds best- request that the insurance rep dress in a French maid’s outfit, and then demand a photo for your blog.
13. zed
have you got any lawyer friends ? get them to draft a letter for you. i had a colleague who studied law and liked nothing better than to write long letters of complaint for me (and entirely in my right) whilst slipping in the odd latin phrase here and there.
he did this twice to eurofuckingstar for me and i got free tickets as compensation.
it’s worth a try.
14. Lori
I’m not single, male or you and I think those speakers look sexy. Without that nasty minging dent though, obviously. I’d be gutted too. Can’t you threaten to take your business elsewhere unless they show you the money? Or are good cleaners hard to come by? I’d wrap the speakers in bubble wrap every time the cleaner was due to come round from now on… just to rub it in :)
15. matthew
Have you ever thought of… get this… doing the cleaning yourself…? Surely that would prevent any further accidents?
16. Adrian
The one thing that doing the cleaning myself would not do, and this I guarantee, is prevent further accidents.
The other reason I didn’t push too hard with the cleaning company is I really like my cleaner. She actually is really good, and I don’t want her to get into trouble for what essentially is an accident.
When I got home Friday night she had left a note
I actually feel quite guilty now for having made a fuss.