Snowboarding had its up and downs. Both literally and emotionally. The friends I went with were all pretty experienced, I was not. One of the reasons I had avoided going previously was I that was weary of being by myself on a slope struggling, while everyone went off and had fun. This was what happened last time I went skiing and that was just with one person. I don't like the feeling of being inadequate at things and it has the potential to create a high level of despondency in me.
Cue day one, where I'm lying flat on my back on a slope, unable to get down it by myself. It's not a pleasant feeling. The next morning one of my friends (a snowboarder too) spent the morning with me, giving me tips, helping me, yelling at me, basically coaching me. He got me up to speed such that when I started my intermediate lessons the next morning, I was good enough to not drop out of the class. I ended back of the class, but 3 of 6 people dropped out so I don't think it was too bad.
Out of the 8 days skiing, I had two good days. The rest was mostly between tough, and depressing. The two good days where the two days I spent some time with my mates I went with. The depressing days I spent mostly by myself struggling.
I felt like I was back at school. That suddenly the holiday had become exclusive to 9 other people, and that it was up to me to become good enough to be allowed to join them. It was a lot of pressure. Every morning I had lessons, which I wasn't great at, but I got through. Then I had about 90 minutes to meet my friends for lunch, which normally entailed me carefully traversing half the mountain along slopes I didn't no to try find them. And not be late. It was a lot of pressure, and I'd be lying if I didn't want to quite and go home.
Now the question that remains in my head, was it my responsibility to get up to speed with everyone else, or should everyone else have taken a bit of time off to ski with me. I understand that we all had paid a lot for the ski trip, and that no on wants to be with the beginner, but in my head, if everyone had spent an hour or two with me in the afternoon, then everyone would have had an average hour or two once, and I would have had more than two days that were good.
But no one really seemed all that bothered. Now I think if I was there with some beginners I would have spent some time making sure they were having a good time too. Perhaps its my perception of things that’s faulty, and perhaps I should just be a big boy and not depend on my friends to make sure I was ok, but I reckon they would have done so for a partner, and I feel(felt?) let down.
Fortunately, I somehow, managed to pull it together on the last day, and actually had a reasonable time. Although even then, on the one day I could actually board more or less, I ended up being left by myself for a portion of the day where I wasn't sure if I was going to end up doing anymore boarding with my mates, and was fuming till they arrived.
If it wasn't for my mate on the second day spending time with me, and the last day I managed to figure out how to carve and board properly, I don't think I would ever consider going again. Right now, I probably would go again, but would check the levels of the people going before I quite made up my mind.
1. Francesca
Plain and simple, that sucks.
If you go as a group, there is no obligation to always be together, but there was no reason for you, as the beginner, to be almost completely abandoned - as it seems from your post. Nothing wrong with meeting halfway, though it sounds like you were making the effort to get your boarding up to scratch, and very few of your group were making the effort to help you along.
I have skiied with friends who are much better than I am, and either way they have always been good enough to spend time with me, even if it means dumbing their skiing down. After all, you go skiing together, right ? If you later want to try out a baby slope while they cruise down a double diamond black, that is also fine - it is their holiday, too. You learn something from them and they get to hang out with you.
Skiing holidays cost a lot, yes. But it does not cost anything to be considerate.
2. Katherine
I’ve not gone on some skiing holidays before because I was worried about exactly that problem. And I made sure that the first time I went skiing, it was a group with lots of other beginners. That seemed to work as we all falling over together.
Sorry to hear this happening to you - sounds like not much fun at all. Take your revenge on the others by making them all come synchronised swimming (substitute suitable sport as appropriate) and then doing all the fancy stuff at the deep end whilst they flounder at the baby end.
I’m still quite crap at skiing so perhaps I should come along with you next time.
3. tucola
The first week of snowboarding can be damn tough if you’re determined to really go for it balls-out and give it your best shot at getting the hang of it.
I remember my first week. One of the toughest physical weeks I can remember having. I ended up covered in bruises, ached absolutely all over, and at various times had been almost crying with frustration. But by the end of the week, I’d just about cracked it sufficiently to start having fun. The initial snowboarding learning curve is much steeper than that for skiing I think. Good work for sticking with it and not dropping out.
In my experience, your more experienced skier mates always mostly ditch you until you are sufficiently good to hang with them. Doesn’t help if most of your mates are driven, (over-)competitive, stress-case type-A personalities. I’ve noticed that there’s often so much pent-up expectation on a ski trip. People have been cooped up in a stressful job thinking about it for weeks. They’ve invested a fair amount of money and a whole 20-25 percent of the all-important annual holiday entitlement and are dying to get out there and put in as many miles as possible from the first lift until sunset every day. Often, if you’re at a large resort, the ‘good’ people end up pissing off to some other side of the mountain for lunch. The beginner can easily just get left behind to flounder until people get back to the hotel for apres-ski beers.
I agree it’s not very considerate, and you wouldn’t get away with doing it to your partner if it was just the two of you on a trip. But, thinking about it, that’s why people who are much better skiers than their partners often try to go on trips with friends at the right level who they can foist their partner on for all or part of the time while they go out with the big boys. People suck, eh? Maybe we all need to chill the hell out… but ski trips in my experience are pretty action-packed and it can be pretty hard work until you’ve got the hang of it…
Great fun once you start getting good though.
4. stacey
Try new things with people that are all new to it, otherwise same thing is bound to happen. It’s only pressure if you allow yourself to fell pressured - which is a tad ridiculous if you are ment to be on holiday - it shouldn’t be stressful - if it happened when you skiid - why did you try that kind of holiday again?
5. Destructor
Thank you, Tucola!
6. Adrian
Stacey, a novice friend was also originally ccoming but pulled out because of work.
I tried it again because I was convinced to go, and that I wouldn’t be left on top of the mountain by myself, by friends who ended up not going because they fell pregnant. And it’s good to try things again, every so often.
7. grumpyoldman
Your experience is not unique to beginers, it occurs any time you go skiing/boarding with people of different skill levels. I have been skiing with my wife in the past who is less adventurous. We found the best solution is 3 days of all-day lessons, followed by several days together when we were both tired. I’ve also found that where only half day lessons were available trying to make contacts during the lesson, to go with afterwards was a good idea.
8. Tol
We’ll come along next time. In fact we’ve half a mind to go back to Val d’Isere later this season. We’re perfectly happy trundling along on greens… More than capable of scaring ourselves on them.
Was good to meet you out there :-)
T&M
9. Lori
Tha’s quite bad of them, I reckon. I’d have been keen to get you going and as enthusiastic as me (if I was experienced at wonter sports), rather than leaving you to it which is rather mean. As you say, if they’d each spent a wee bit of time with you, it wouldn’t have dented their enjoyment but would have improved yours immensely. Not good.
Another reason (along with cost and aversion to exercise) why I don’t do skiing.
10. Tot
Mmm…sounds remarkably like my first ski experience. Key difference is that my friends felt sorry for me so they took me up with them on my first day to a black diamond run and then eventually left me for dead when they bored of my persistent falling down. It took me three hours (till dusk) to get down and I had very real visions of them finding my frozen corpse the next day (-:
Not much fun initially, but without any doubt definitely worth persisting at. I definitely considered giving up.
Based on your description of your last day, next time you will be starting at a much higher skill level, which will make it a much better experience. I think you are at the point where you should improve exponentially.
I don’t think there is a right answer as to whether your friends should spend time with you or not….watching a beginner fall down endlessly is certainly one of life’s least rewarding activities. And you are probably best served doing this with a private instructor than your friends as the instructor is best qualified to help you.
However, saying that - I think I would have spent a couple of afternoons / sessions with you if I was in the same position as I know what it feels like!
Hopefully you persist and see this just as a mandatory step that you had to get through.
11. Kenny
Apart from leaving Tot for dead, I once also left a girlfriend on a beginner slope while I went with other friends… so I can certainly relate to the temptation! (Needless to say, that relationship didn’t last.) It’s probably something to do with the having to wait all year for the one week of skiing that you get to do.
It’s definitely not good form though, I can’t defend that. Your idea of friends dividing their time to spend with you is a good one… you should’ve suggested that while up there!
Stick with it, from personal experience that one week of (emotional and physical) pain is well worth it… once you ‘get it’ (which takes about a week), your next boarding trip will be awesome.
12. Adrian
Leaving Tot on a slope I can understand. Leaving me on a slope I can understand.
Leaving a girlfriend on a slope, well then how do you get your evening shag? Although at least you left her on an beginners slope, unlike Tot, who you tried to kill.
I have booked my brother in for snowboarding lessons on the 17th, and will go and spend the 3 hours practising. I might even try some more jumps.
13. Brother Jon
I hope you didn’t book me in for my first lesson just to have someone that’s more of a beginner than you so that you can feel good about yourself.
It’s ok. I’m sure I can crack it in 3hrs and leave you in the ‘dust’!