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I read that the average couple in their twenties has sex on average 150 times per year. I worked out my average (roughly) has been probably about 10 times a year for the last 6 years. Although this would be more of a flat line with spikes at 3 or 4 points than anything else.

This means to bring myself up to average while I am in my twenties, I would to have 850 or more shags before l I turn thirty. More or less. Assuming some poor misguided soul fell madly in love with me today, thats only once or twice a day. But then lets say I saw my girlfriend 3 times a week (hey she just met me, she isn't going to move in with me or anything. what kind of girl do you think I go for, huh?), That figure increases to 3 times a day on those days.

I figure I can manage that sort of performance. Even being out of practise I should be able to keep up that consistency. Although by August next year I am up to 12 times a day and may then be dead before I am thirty.

What it boils down to (since these things are averages) is that someone out there is having sex instead of me. If you wouldn't mind stopping it and letting the rest of us get a chance? Well just me. Thanks. Much appreciated.